Donny: Phone's ringing, Dude.
The Dude: Thank you, Donny. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Maude Lebowski: What do you do for recreation?
The Dude: Oh, the usual. I bowl. Drive around. The occasional acid flashback. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Dude: That's a great plan, Walter. That's fuckin' ingenious, if I
          understand it correctly. It's a Swiss fuckin' watch. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

[Maude shows the porn video starring Bunny to the Dude]
Sherry in 'Logjammin': [on video] You must be about ready to fix the cable.
Maude Lebowski: Lord. You can imagine where it goes from here.
The Dude: He fixes the cable?
Maude Lebowski: Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey.
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Dude: Fuck sympathy! I don't need your fuckin' sympathy, man, I need my
          fucking johnson! 
Donny: What do you need that for, Dude?
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Dude: God damn you Walter! You fuckin' asshole! Everything's a fuckin'
          travesty with you, man! And what was all that shit about Vietnam?
          What the FUCK, has anything got to do with Vietnam? What the fuck
          are you talking about? 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are
                ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me. 
The Dude: Yeah, but Walter...
Walter Sobchak: Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon... with
                nail polish. These fucking amateurs...  
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: I told those fucks down at the league office a thousand times
                that I don't roll on Shabbos!
Donny: What's Shabbos?
Walter Sobchak: Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That
                means that I don't work, I don't get in a car, I don't fucking
                ride in a car, I don't pick up the phone, I don't turn on the
                oven, and I sure as shit 
[shouts]
Walter Sobchak: don't fucking roll! Shomer shabbos!
The Dude: Walter...
Walter Sobchak: Shomer fucking shabbos.
The Dude: Oh fuck it. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Blond Treehorn Thug: [holding up a bowling ball] What the fuck is this?
The Dude: Obviously you're not a golfer.
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: Nihilists! Fuck me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets
                of National Socialism, Dude, at least it's an ethos.
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: Shut the fuck up, Donny. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Dude: It's like what Lenin said... you look for the person who will
          benefit, and, uh, uh... 
Donny: I am the walrus.
The Dude: You know what I'm trying to say...
Walter Sobchak: That fucking bitch...
The Dude: Oh yeah!
Donny: I am the walrus.
Walter Sobchak: Shut the fuck up, Donny! V.I. Lenin. Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov! 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Dude: And, you know, he's got emotional problems, man.
Walter Sobchak: You mean... beyond pacifism?
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Dude: Jesus, man, could you change the channel?
Cab Driver: Fuck you man. If you don't like my fuckin' music get your own
            fuckin' cab! 
The Dude: I had a rough...
Cab Driver: I pull over and kick your ass out!
The Dude: Come on, man. I had a rough night and I hate the fuckin' Eagles,
          man! 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: Fucking Germans. Nothing changes. Fucking Nazis.
Donny: They were Nazis, Dude?
Walter Sobchak: Oh, come on Donny, they were threatening castration! Are we
                gonna split hairs here? 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: He lives in North Hollywood on Radford, near the In-and-Out
                Burger... 
The Dude: The In-and-Out Burger is on Camrose.
Walter Sobchak: Near the In-and-Out Burger...
Donny: Those are good burgers, Walter.
Walter Sobchak: Shut the fuck up, Donny.
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: Those rich fucks! This whole fucking thing... I did not watch
                my buddies die face down in the muck so that this fucking
                strumpet... 
The Dude: I don't see any connection to Vietnam, Walter.
Walter Sobchak: Well, there isn't a literal connection, Dude.
The Dude: Walter, face it, there isn't any connection.
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Stranger: There's just one thing, Dude.
The Dude: And what's that?
The Stranger: Do you have to use so many cuss words?
The Dude: What the fuck you talking about?
The Stranger: Okay, Dude. Have it your way. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Big Lebowski: Isn't that what makes a man?
The Dude: Mmm, sure. That and a pair of testicles. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Bunny Lebowski: I'll suck your cock for a thousand dollars.
Brandt: Ah hahahahaha! Wonderful woman. We're all, we're all very fond of
        her. Very free-spirited.
Bunny Lebowski: Brandt can't watch, though, or he has to pay a hundred.
Brandt: Ah haha. That's marvelous.
The Dude: Uh, I'm just gonna go find a cash machine. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Maude Lebowski: Do you like sex, Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude: 'Scuse me?
Maude Lebowski: Sex. The physical act of love. Coitus. Do you like it?
The Dude: I was talking about my rug.
Maude Lebowski: You're not interested in sex?
The Dude: You mean coitus?
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

[while dunking the Dude's head in the toilet]
Blond Treehorn Thug: Where's the money, Lebowski? Where's the fucking money,
                     shithead?
The Dude: It's uh... uh... it's down there somewhere, let me take another
look.
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Dude: Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski". You're
          Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know,
          that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're
          not into the whole brevity thing.
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: Am I wrong?
The Dude: No you're not wrong.
Walter Sobchak: Am I wrong?
The Dude: You're not wrong Walter. You're just an asshole.
Walter Sobchak: All right then. 
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Walter Sobchak: Also, let's not forget - let's NOT forget, Dude - that keeping
                wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know,
                within the city - that aint legal either.
The Dude: What are you, a fucking park ranger now?
Walter Sobchak: No, I'm -
The Dude: Who gives a shit about the marmot!
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

Donny: They posted the next round for the tournament.
Walter Sobchak: Donny, shut the f- when do we play?
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"

The Dude: Walter, I love you, but sooner or later, you're going to have to
          realize the fact that you're a god damn moron.
           -- from the movie "The Big Lebowski"